I Need A Gift

Positive and constructive feedback is a gift that you can give and receive, but unfortunately, most people aren’t very good at it because it is not being viewed as a gift.  When someone tells you that something you are doing is disruptive, ineffective or problematic they are saying, “Hey, I care about your success. You can be better.”  The problem is that if we are in the wrong frame of mind we hear, “You don’t measure up; you’ll never make it; everyone else is passing you in the fast lane.”   It’s silly but it’s true. 

Growth leaders seek the gift for themselves and their teams.  They put their head in the right spot and seek the feedback.  They embrace the idea that they are not perfect and want to know what’s in their blind spots.  They also want to know what they do well so they do more of that.  Here’s the most important part.  When they get feedback they do something with it.  Even if they don’t agree with the feedback, someone elses perception is their reality and the receiver of the feedback now has the knowledge to do something different to change others’ perception.   Knowledge is power. 

Many companies conduct 360 degree feedback assessments to provide their leaders with input from many other individuals of all different levels within a company who interact with the employee.  I am a huge believer in 360 reviews but because they are administered every 12-24 months, the feedback is often not as timely as needed.

Another source of getting feedback is to administer feedback assessments on yourself every 3 to 6 months.  Send people you work for, with, and lead, a letter (email will work if you provide an option for anonyminity) and ask them to invest in your development by sending you back their thoughts on these three questions:

• What should I start doing that I’m not doing now?
• What should I stop doing that?
• What should I continue doing?

And lastly, if you make it a point to ask for continuous feedback it will be easy to receive and easy to give.  At first people might have a hard time giving you candid feedback, but if you consistently ask others to tell you how you’re doing, they will.  They’ll probably ask you for your opinion in return.  And then the gift keeps giving.

Guidelines for asking for feedback:

• Ask for something specific – “What do you think was the weakest part and strongest part of the presentation?”  Not –“So, what you think?”
• Give people permission to tell you the truth – “I really respect your insights.  I’d like to know what I can do better the next time.”
• Thank them for the gift.  “I really appreciate your opinion.  Thank you for being willing to help me improve.”
• Ask for feedforward.  “I’m gearing up for my next presentation.  What can I do to make it valuable to the attendees?”

Guidelines for giving feedback:

• Focus as much on the positive as the constructive feedback.  “I saw everyone taking notes when you unveiled your goals with such excitement.  The whole team is onboard with the new plan. Great job.” 
• Talk about your observations and feelings.  “I love the way you make everyone feel at ease at our staff meetings.  However, some of the small talk takes up a lot of time and I miss the chance to workout some of the business issues.  How about inviting everyone to dail in five minutes early for some social time?”
• Offer a solutions, not just criticism. “I feel disconnected because you are not very visible on the floor.  It would be great if you could walk around the department in the afternoons.”
• Use facts not “suspicions” It is not helpful to say “I get the sense that everyone is unhappy.” 
• If the feedback is unsolicited, prepare them for it.  “I have made some observations lately that I’d like to share with you.  Could I come by this afternoon to discuss my feedback with you?

Feedback creates a platform for growth.  And, although growth can be painful at times, is necessary to become the man or woman you are capable of being. 

Lead on!

If you are interested in help starting a feedback process in your company, team or life, contact me at New Day Solutions, Inc. lday@newdaysolutionsinc.com.  We’re dedicated to helping businesses and individuals achieve their goals.